There are times at work, when I am expected to break the monotony of the day with humor. More often than not, things are only funny to me…so maybe I am just breaking the monotony of MY day…
Regardless of what, or why, I do what I do…this is what happened.
I walked into the purchasing agent’s office to order some materials for a project of mine after he returned from his normal afternoon nap in his car. These naps are a regular occurrence. They happen everyday and even people he only deals with on the phone know not to try to call him from 12:30 to 1:30pm everyday.
One of our regular suppliers called while I was mid-conversation with the purchasing agent in his office…he answered on the speaker phone.
(*What you need to understand is that this is a conversation between three people who talk about 20 times day on the telephone. I am not normally included in these conversations.)
Purchasing Agent: What do you want?
Supplier: You called me earlier.
Purchasing Agent: So?
Supplier: I tried calling you back at about 1pm, but you were out taking your daily nap.
Me: Napping?!?! Is that what he tells everyone? You know he really out there masturbating?
The supplier laughs loudly…and hysterically. This was odd because it really wasn’t that funny.
Purchasing Agent: What’s so funny?
Supplier (seriously): I can normally only do that during the weekend.
(*At this time, I am conducting an interview.)
Me (sarcastically and fighting laughter): Only during the weekend?
Supplier: Yeah, I don’t have time during the week.
Me: What kind of time do you need?
Supplier: Things have to be just right?
Me: There is nothing romantic in just banging one out, right?
Me: Taking a hot bath and lighting candles works, huh?
Supplier: I never tried candles.
Me: You should, it is soothing.
Supplier: I’ll try it this weekend.
Me: Do me a favor?
Me: Please don’t think about me.
Supplier: I’ll try not to.